About Me

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Lemme keep it simple.. I am what I am.. but for you to form your own version of what I am, you gotta figure out what I am.. and for that you prolly might need to waste some time trying to do that.. but is it all worth the effort... well I dont know.. I leave that to you ! Lot of people in this world are deprived of all that they are eligible, but are still happy with what has been left back... and then there are this other set of people who are blessed with all that one can possibly imagine, but then they arent happy, because they are so worried about figuring out, if they were deprived of something...I fall in the first category, take one day at a time, have plans for the next 4 hours in your life and if you made it safe to your bed that day, without any problems, without any major set backs and with a joy that to someone somewhere, you did do a little something, well, then to me, I lived one more day fruitfully...Ah, too much of philosophy aint it... but that's the way I like it... I would want to be a hero in life, but then again I guess "All heroes become a bore at last"... So I guess I will just be the ordinary person in life, who still can stand out extra ordinary ofcourse...

Saturday, March 20, 2010

The day when I was told.. "You made a difference to us"!

Its friday night... the clock says the time is around 1 in the morning.. I aint asleep yet... Nope.. I aint slogging at work... nor trying to work from home to get things done.. I aint awake coz I aint getting no sleep, coz am stressed out or nothing.. Am awake coz I was moved by something that I saw.. a movie.. a movie named "Gridiron Gang"..
Friday nights have always been pretty mundane.. hang around with friends... let the "elixirs of life" flow.. or slog at office..
Today I had decided to come home and just chill at home..
I was as always channel surfing when I stumbled into this movie on HBO.. titled "Gridiron Gang".. The story line is very special.. An ex football player turned coach who works at a correction center, trains a bunch of teenage boys, who are serving their juvenile crime sentences, into playing football.. and in the name of football teaches these kids what it means to stand up and fight for, in life.. what self esteem is all about.. what does it mean to walk with pride..
The movie actually brought back an interesting incident in my life, which is still vivid in my eyes.. I was so choked up with emotions, that I had to vent it out.. So here's how it goes..
It was the most difficult period of my life.. I was very sick.. survival chances was almost zilch.. I had no clue as to what was wrong with me.. (Now   I am not gonna sit and educate you on the medical terms of what my illness was all about and steal away your reading passion here...) I was in this Intensive Care Unit.. all by myself.. with only the nurses to keep company, and the occasional visit from doctors, who would keep checking on me..
Those were the days, wherein I used to count minutes.. watch the clock for hours and it would just move a few minutes.. Intensive Care Units or ICUs as they are called in this part of the world, have always its own share of intenseness... lives are brought in dangling by the thread.. and the messiahs of God.. the doctors try all their might, to save precious lives.. It was one such day.. around 6.30 PM when I could hear the nurses running helter skelter and I could hear the distant cries of a lady as well... No one would tell me what was going on.. Two days past and on the third day, I saw a lady, with her face all puffed up coz of profuse crying.. peep into my room, because she couldnt bear to hear my wails of pain.. That day I was in a lot of pain, and almost was on the verge of throwing my hands in the air, and asking Lord Almighty.. "I give up.. Now take me back..".
She came next to me, sat next to me, placed her hands on my forehead and said.. "Dont worry son, you will be just fine..." She must have been in her early 40s I thought and she gave a faint smile at me,when I turned to her.. I asked her, what brings you here, and why are you crying.. She just replied, "My son is admitted.. he is sick".. and she went off..
It got me curious, and I started asking the nurses about her son.. At first they hesitated and then told me.. her son had attempted a suicide because of a love failure, and both the girl and her son had been brought to the hospital and were battling for their lives.. I havent actually managed to understand what drives people to suicide, until one day when I almost stood facing it.. (Now that's a different story...). A week later, I learnt her son was progressing well.. He was still in the same ICU.. and one evening he came to visit me. That was the first time I was seeing him. He was all weak, worn out, and very young.. He had just completed his 12th standard.
He came to my bed, sat next to me and we talked. I dont know what got into me, (maybe it was the morphines that I was constantly being given, to curb my pain).. I started talking to him about life.. To this day I dont remember what I spoke to him, but all I remember is, I spoke to him for a very long time. Finally he bid me good night and went to his bed. After a few days I was shifted to the general ward and was moved to a separate room. I had totally forgotten about this boy to whom I spoke to. I was recovering, but very slowly and was still in a whole lot of pain.
One afternoon, a young lady, probably in her 25, walked into my room held me by my hand and said.. "Krish, thank you.. thank you so much".. I was confused. I was already under a lot of sleeping doze and I was still trying to figure out what was reality and what was not. Here was a lady, who knew my name and was thanking me for something which I didnt even know. I looked around to see if I could find my lil girl (that's my mum..). I cudnt find my mum in the room. I asked this lady.."I dont seem to remember you..". She then called a trim looking young man, who walked in with a big smile and said.."Brother remember me" ?? After a lot of thinking I finally recognised him.. He was the same worn out boy to whom I had spoken to in the ICU. My my, I must admit, he had changed a lot. With great enthusiasm he said.."Brother, you know what, I joined Engineering".. I still didnt understand what was going on. His sister then told me something which I still remember "Krish, I dont know what you told my brother, but you gave us our family's hope. We thought we had lost him, when he attempted the suicide and didnt know how to talk him through. You did that.. You made him realise life's importance and its meaning.. Now I have two brothers, including you".. So saying, she took out a silver ring, that she carefully gift wrapped, and put it onto my fingers. By then my mum had come. She told my mum.."Aunty, you have a very responsible son".. My mum was in tears, but I was still not sure what was going on..

Tonight as I watched that movie, wherein Rock, who plays the coach role, walk past the "Gridiron gang" team, who manage to win a match, with a smile on his face, depicting that satisfaction of having made a difference in life, it brings back memories of one of the very few people, who ever came and told me "Krish, you made a difference in our lives.."..


  1. krish this is what i've been telling u on and off .u are "someone" dude.and i am really proud to be called as an aquaintance atleast. keep it up kidoo.

  2. A Good one .. Keep it uP! .. :) :) :) .. GBU !

  3. It's like a movie story but heart touching. YOu are not only life savor, motivator ..... above all you are the MASTER OF PAYPAL :)